Welcome Preacher

They Have Episode 1

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Jonathan “Pearls” Cho did not get his name for being the portrait of perfection. In fact he looked the exact opposite. His hair was rather oily and unkempt, his chin was covered in stubble and his complexion was on the other side of good. Jonathan Frakes picked up his name from his teeth, for when he parted his chapped and peeling lips behind them his teeth shown pearly white. You have to know though that when those teeth start flashing around someone in the near vicinity is going to wish they had made peace with their god.

 

Pearls was Captain of the Tienen, a Killer Bee class transport ship, with a small crew. Pearls loved that ship more than life itself. He loved all of it, from the cock pit to the aft double barreled MAC (Magnetic Accelerated Cannon). He had heard of such people as Malcolm Reynolds making transport and smuggling runs with no guns but the iron they strapped. That life was not for him! Put simply he wasn’t trusting enough, he knew the competitive business meant people will try to steal your transport.

 

At the moment Pearls was on a job that was going south. He stood in front of Tanner Ling and Adrianna Lee, his helpers in all things on the wrong side of the law. “Now ya see what we got ourselves here is a problem!” spat the grizzled old man in front of him. “Ya’ll want this cred’ ya say. I just don’t reckon that that’s what’s gonna happen.” His hand rested on the butt of a pistol strapped to his thigh.

 

Pearls already had his pistol out and pointing at the man. “We got here first and we have this safe open already, plus you see we already got our iron pointed somewhere and you’re on the wrong end.” Pearls pointed his pistol over away from the safe. “Now why don’t ya’ll kindly move yourselves over there and we’ll be getting’ out of your way.” The men slowly moved away from the opening. “Tanner get the goods so we can get out of here. Adri keep your gun pointin’ at ‘em. We don’t want ‘em comin’ after us.” He slowly walked forward keeping his eyes and gun pointing at the men.

 

Not a moment after he got into the safe than gun shots started blasting out behind him. He dropped to his knees and turned. “Adri what in the hell is goin’ on? I didn’t want no problems on this job!” He fired a shot at one of the men. “Mr. Domingez said it would be gorram easy!”

 

Adrianna called back, “Cap’n I think them as wants the money can’t give it up as easy as you’d like!” The shots stopped Adri yelled, “Cap’n they all’ve been dispatched.”

 

Pearls smiled and tapped his COM. “Buriphany?” he simpered the words into the COM. “Baby we’ll be needin’ a pick up! Now would be about the best time!” He walked out with two large bags of creds’ over his shoulder. With a smile and a wink he added, “Let’s see who my wife’s picked up for board.”

 

******

 

They waited on the roof for a few moments until the ship came into view. Everyone was tense the man who owned the home could be home at any second. The little border planet of Elysium was a freshly terra-formed planet. The Magistrate here was the oldest richest fart this side of Hera. The man wouldn’t share a single credit. The Tienen dropped out of the clouds, the cargo bay open they walked on board and flew off into a high orbit. Pearls counted the money dropping Mr. Domingez’s cut into a bag placing it safely into his hide-a-hole.

 

Up in the galley Pearls threw the rest of the goods on the table. “There,” he said. “We got us a job that actually paid.” He had already pocketed his portion and taken it to his quarters. He had started to walk away from the table when he noticed the two extra people sitting there. He turned his gaze on the older of the two, he looked about as old as Pearls himself. A glint of read appeared at the neck of his robe. Pearls’ mouth dropped open. It can’t be!

 

“What side were you on during the war?” he asked rather heatedly. He pointed at the red heart that hung around the man’s neck.

 

The man slowly turned his gaze on Pearls. “Aw, you must be the captain. Captain Cho, I must know why you ask this question?” The man spoke with the measured accent of the core, which always made you feel out of place around him.

 

Pearls pulled out his own red heart. “It’s Pearls, Captain Pearls if ya want, and this is why.”

 

The man’s mouth fell open, “Y-you were in the Red Hearts Brigade?” He blinked heard and continued, “But only thirteen of us made it off planet after Hera fell.”

 

“I’s one of the hundan that didn’t try ’n’ make it off planet. I was gettin’ paid several hundred thousand creds’ a year. Ya know money is money and with the Browncoats out…”

 

“What rank were you? Who did you work for?” asked the passenger.

 

“I think we should be continuin’ this here talk in my quarters,” Pearls motioned the man to follow him. The man got up to follow him and stopped.

 

“My disciple,” he indicated the man sitting next to him, “will be coming with us. Anything I know he knows.” Pearls got a sour look on his face. This wasn’t what he wanted to here. They picked up a preacher! Why the hell would they pick up a preacher? They knew above everything never bring a preacher on this ship.

 

Grimly Pearls consented to the man coming. They walked up the stairs and to the Crew quarters first floor. Being the captain of this ship for six years, Pearls knew where everyone was staying just from seeing how they had decorated the door.

 

They walked passed a door covered in intricate drawings and calligraphy, Adri. She loved to do these things with her hands. The Beautiful drawings of Women in kimonos, and sunsets, the Chinese, Japanese and whatever other kind of calligraphy she had learned hanging there were her personality completely.

 

The next was covered in captures of beautiful nearly nude woman, Tanner’s room. Tanner loved the opposite sex almost too much. If the Alliance ever made it illegal to love woman in any certain amount Tanner would have been locked up for life.

 

The next door was blank except for a small sign indicating its occupant. This was the Doc’s room. She wasn’t really an open woman. She kept everything in and told as little as possible. They walked on to the last door on this level, the mechanic’s.

 

He was a little eccentric but the only man who could keep this boat in the air. David thankfully had kept most of his eccentricities to himself when he and Pearls had first met. This made sure that Pearls had hired him. They moved up the stairs to the Captains Quarters. Pearls had long ago fooled himself into believing that he had taken these quarters so his genius wife could have some comfort. The quarters were three times the size of the standard crew quarters and Pearls loved every centimeter. He and the preacher walked in and Pearls sat down in his chair.

 

“So what god you preachin’ for?” he asked with clear contempt in his voice.

 

“I am following and ‘preachin’ as you say for Jinyer. He is the son of God, the son of Greorin. His teachings are vast and wonderful and lead to true enlightenment.” He pointed at his disciple again, “This is my disciple in the Ancient Tradition his name is Ackmud. Fully he is called Ackmud I of Meltan.”

 

Pearls let a smirk come to his face. “Which planet were you on?”

 

“I was under Lt. Ford on Londinium. I have no clue as to who he answered to.”

 

“Me,” Pearls grinned.

 

“What?”

 

“Your boss answered to me. I gave Lt. Ford orders and he apparently gave them to you and yours.” Pearls sneered at the astonishment on the preacher’s face.

 

“I don’t know what I’m more astounded at that you were my boss’ boss or that you are speaking as if you lived every day in the core rather than you were just a moment ago,” this man was astounding the preacher more and more. “I am Jeroboam Meltan follower of Jinyer, I have put the war behind me. I would ask that you not speak to me of it anymore.”

 

“But it’s the chief of speech on this here boat. I think you best answer what I’m askin’ preacher.” Pearls moved into the Rim accent very smoothly. “Or you can be off my boat at the next stop and I ain’t in no carin’ mood as to whether it be your stop or not.”

 

“Well Colonel, after the war I got off Londinium hit Sihnon and ran out to the border. I tried to get a plot of land somewhere but just kept losing money. Finally I found a man who asked me to be his disciple. I came to my faith and then to the Church of Jinyer on Elysium. Then I picked up my disciple and in the tradition of the faith changed my name from Ackmud IV of Sirien to Jeroboam Meltan. And here I am to take the faith to the core. We have been sent to start a Church of Jinyer on Londinium.”

 

“There’s a thing that keeps bothering me preacher. If all your priests is named Jeroboam and all your disciples is named Ackmud then how does all the people tell each other apart?”

 

“That is the reason for the last name. I am Jeroboam Meltan, for my original last name was Meltan, and my disciple is Ackmud I of Meltan or the first disciple of Jeroboam Meltan. Dong Ma?”

 

Pearls lapsed into silence. “Thank ya, preacher, I need to take all this into thought and look it all through.” He tapped his COM, “Tanner please come to my quarters and take the preacher and his boy to theirs.” There was a knock on the door a few moments later, a few tense, staring moments later.

 

“Cap, here ‘o take ‘em,” Tanner said with a quick smile. Tanner was always giving quick tooth-full smiles. Pearls had asked him the reason one time and Tanner said it was because he wanted to inflict as much fear with his smile as Pearls did with his. Pearls was constantly annoyed by this. The only reason Pearls smiled was to bluff. You smile at a man to tell him you’re going to kill him. Not to inflict fear.

 

As the preacher and his disciple followed Tanner, Pearls left his quarters and went to the bridge. Buri was sitting behind the controls pushing buttons and setting coordinates. He kissed the back of her neck and sat down in the copilot’s chair. She looked at him with love and care and annoyance. How she did this Pearls could never guess. He chucked it to being one of those things, “women can do and men can’t! That’s just how it is.”

 

“What’s wrong baby?” he asked in his most sincere voice.

 

“Their trying to get our location, so I gotta stop that and set the drive at the same time and it’s a load chuiniu and I want to shove it down their throats!” she spat the words as if trying to let the men on the ground feel her anger. She tapped a button on the controls and the Tienen launched into the black. “The only problem is ya got here at the end.”

 

“I’ll watch the bridge baby. Ya go sleep. It’ll be several hours before we need ya up and about again. Specially carryin’ a baby as ya are.” She tapped a button to lock up the controls.

 

“I hear we got us a preacher aboard,” she said rubbing her swollen belly. “I’s thinkin’ that maybe he could bless the babe.”

 

Pearls scowled, this was the problem of having a wife who believed in that God. “He ain’t no preacher of your God. He said he’s followin’ someone called Jin Years, or some such god.”

 

She sniffed. She had heard the acid in his voice when he had said, “Your God.” Pearls didn’t believe in God, he never had. If God had existed there wouldn’t have been such an evil Alliance in charge of the ‘verse.

 

“I guess we’ll have to wait until we stop at Sihnon then. Or we could stop somewheres along the way.”

 

Pearls sighed. “I don’t see why ya gotta have this gorram blessin’. The baby’ll come out just as easy without it.” Pearls was not ready to be a father. It was definitely going to make work harder.

 

“The baby an’ I ain’t stayin’ on this boat if you keep puttin’ up this fight,” Buri threatened.

 

Pearls new this, she had said it several times. “OK but we ain’t stoppin’ afore we hit Sihnon.”  Pearls always gave in and had again tricked himself long ago that it was to keep a genius pilot on the bridge of his boat rather than any other reason. He never told Buri these things, it was just easier not to.

 

“I’m glad ya see reason at least part o’ the time,” she said.

 

“Oh, yeah and what do ya conjure I see the rest o’ the time?”

 

“Love.”

 

And with that one word she left the bridge.

 

 

 

******

 

Six hours later a red light started flashing on the control panel. “Gou shi what in the gorram ‘verse is goin’ on now?” Pearls yelled. He had been having problems for the last forty minutes. He pressed another button and finally got the warning label to appear on the screen. The fuel was running low. “Qingwa cao de liumang!” he stopped the boat an turned on the NAV system. He had enough fuel to make it to Ariel and refuel. He changed the destination and started the engines.

 

“Buri I need ya on the bridge.”

 

 

Buri ran up to the bridge a few minutes later. Her look yelled what, her body yelled I shouldn’t have run.

 

“We’re running on fumes. We have enough to hit Ariel, I think, but I’m not sure.” She looked him square in the face. She looked upset.

 

“How do I explain this to you?” she asked. “We were too busy keepin’ in the air as to pick yer sorry asses up off the ground and get you to safety in the black to refuel.” She threw another dagger of a look straight into Pearls’ face. “So why are you upset again?”

 

She was the only person in the ‘verse that could make Pearls’ face drop color like that. “Nothing,” he finally said. “I just need you to get us to Ariel because that is the closest planet and we need fuel.”

 

She nodded, “That’s something I can do.”

 

 

 

Chinese:

Hundan – Bastards

Dong Ma – Understand

Chuiniu – Bullshit

Gou shi – Crap

Qingwa cao de liumang – Frog-humping Son of a Bitch